UPDATED: Sorry, no free buttons at the event -- they are only available at jcpenney stores.
We're normally not susceptible to the sneaky publicity stunts of national retailers, but.... this is crazy: J.C. Penney (sorry, still not on board with "jcpenney") will be launching a blimp over Market Square tomorrow to unleash parachute-equipped gifts onto the heads of puzzled pedestrians.
Yes, that's right -- and let us emphasize this in all caps: GIFTS WILL BE PARACHUTING INTO DOWNTOWN TOMORROW... FROM A BLIMP!
It all has something to do with the "jcp Holiday Charitable Giving Tour," which is traveling across the country "carrying out special acts of generosity in a new city each day." (Our suggestion for a poetic act of generosity: help us restore their old, empty building on Gay Street.)
We're sure it will all be much clearer tomorrow after the bombardment, but here's the press release: